Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Top Three

Top Three: Favorite dreams I have had since Ben was born.

1. Scott wearing Stephanie's cardigan out and about and being hurt when I laughed at him. His reasoning? He was cold. I shouldn't have laughed, it really did flatter his Popeye muscles.

2. Sitting on an airplane with a few friends, the plane tilts forward at a frightening angle and our cups of water fall out of the cup holders and tumble to the front of the plane. Later on the flight attendant announces that he is testing the cups for DNA, since it is imperative that the airline discovers who would be so rude as to hurl their cups at the front of the plane.

3. Attempting to seduce Scott, but everytime he begins to reciprocate, I fall asleep (that's a classic for first time parenting, don't you think?)

Top Three: Things that belong on a coaster, a household-wide study.

1. Remote Controls

2. Cell Phones, which apparently trump remote controls.

3.  Etcetera.

Top Three: Quotes from my husband. That I remembered to write down.

1. After clicking on a pop-up that was all but screaming "computer eating virus!" I asked him why in the world he would do such a thing. He replied, "I just wanted to put myself in the pants of an old person." Maybe a review of common sayings is in order.

2. "Two women chatting at a stop sign should be the symbol for infinity, not that twirly thing."

3. "What do you mean by 'on the fence'? You made that up, didn't you?!"
I refer back to #1.

Give me your top three list!


  1. Top Three Funny Zach Moments:

    1. Diaper Baby in socks dance

    2. When he'd say "Raccoon" and sound it like "F#$% YOU"

    3. When he thought his own poop was a Frog.

  2. Not that I'm a part of this, but I totally want to contribute...

    Top 3 quotes from teaching elementary age kids:

    1. After telling on her friend for stealing the glue stick at the craft table, and me starting to walk over and talk to the offender:

    "Don't worry about it. She'll be dealt with in hell."

    2. On the last day of class when we were going to play in the sprinklers:

    "Can you please announce to the other kids that they should not give me wedgies? I've got my momma's build." (whispers) "You know, big legs..."

    3. After welcoming a new group of fifth graders to an after school program:

    "Is that your real voice?"

    And I think you blog is adorable Mary. You seem so happy!

  3. These top threes put mine to shame! I LOVE IT! Kelly: That kid is hysterical. Kim: You are TOTALLY a part of this! I actually wanted to email you something today but thought that you would think it was coming from left field. I will send it.

    I want more of these, kid stuff is my favorite, they are way more hysterical than adults.

  4. Top 3 Things they tell you in elementary and high school that I will never understand and don't apply to real life...:
    1. You can't chew gum.
    2. Your day is dictated by obnoxious ringing bells.
    3. Someone else tells you when you can go to the bathroom.

    Somewhat random, but this is too fun. I might be a repeat poster on this one... :)

  5. Thanks for all this fun Mary!

    I only have one right now. My sister sent my husband a birthday card and I'm still giggling over it. It shows an old guy sitting at the table, head back and mouth hanging open (you know the way old people sleep)a birthday cake full of lit candles and a wife watching and waiting. It says "Birthday boy closed his eyes to make a wish and that's all she wrote"

  6. :( my comments arent showing up with my word press identity!

  7. Krystal: I don't think Word Press is connected to the Blogger world... keep trying I want to see your comments!!

  8. 3 - at the doc the other day for a cold...first thing n does when doc walks in the room is pull his pants down and say, "see my underwear!"

    2 - after pulling up his underwear all by himself (yes, this is a huge accomplishment!) his penis was pointed up rather than down, and was sticking out the top of his underwear...n stood there staring at it and quietly laughing to himself. when asked what was so funny, he said, "it yooks yike a nake" (it looks like a snake)

    1 - lots of naked booty time since there is nothing in the way when he has to rush to the potty, (there are too many full moon in yo face stories to tell) all he has to do is run to the potty....one such incident, while in tahoe visiting my parents n was upstairs and too far away from the potty...he went running down the hall crying and shouting, i have to run to the potty. dad came to the rescue and was running down the stairs with n when i looked up and saw poop! not wanting to clean poop off my mom's carpet, i shouted, "its poop!" and in true daddy fashion, he reached out and caught the poo with his bare hands! n was plopped down on the potty (which he didnt need anymore) and j was off to the bathroom! we tried so hard not to make a deal out of it and just congratulated n for telling us he had to go and trying to get to the potty in time!

    (see what you have to look forward too!)